Moving House Is Like Giving Birth

I have been a little quiet of late – that’s because I just gave birth – oh sorry, no we just moved house.

We got ourselves a funky new pad right near the kid’s school and skatepark, across the road from the bowls club (handy for beers at good old 1974 – well maybe 1999 prices), around the corner form the best sushi joint, coffee joint, video store – see, we got it all going on.  It’s smaller but much cleaner, prettier and it makes us all very happy. We got ourselves a deck and a verandah, a decent sized yard – see, we got it all going on.

But the move….. the move…… well it was just like giving birth – you don’t remember how bad it was until you go through it again and then what do you say……

NEVER AGAIN!!!

That’s what it’s like though isn’t it, it’s like the final stages of pregnancy, the birth and then bringing the baby home.  Here, I’ll show you.

Packing up the house – The Last Trimester:
You think you are organized.  You start collecting boxes and newspapers, you look around, you have a plan in your head.  You start packing all of the ‘little things’, the things that you don’t really need right now and then it’s like ‘oh man, I’m too tired for this shit, I’ll just have a little lie down…….’
Then the next day, you start packing a little more and the day after you start packing a little more.  It’s 2 weeks out and you think, ‘oh crap, better get a move on’ and then its the week before, then the day before. At this point, you get to the ‘throw all that crap in the one box and we will sort it when we get there’ stage. You look around and think, this is never going to end, it’s going to keep going and going and going. There is still so much stuff to pack……. when will it end…….so, just like the final weeks and days of pregnancy, it feels like it will never, ever, ever happen!

The Move – Giving Birth
Yay, it’s moving day, right, get up, get sorted, anticipation, anxiety, excitement – yep, this move is going to go smooth, it’ll all go to plan, there will be no dramas…….. see just like a birth plan……Well, out the door that goes. It’s going to be 32 degrees today – super. The removalists rock up and jump straight into it – oops, no, that was in my fantasy. To be fair, they weren’t too bad but dude, if you do this as a living, surely you can suss out how to put stuff in the truck as you’re lifting and moving – come on man, you’re on the clock!!! All of the big stuff gets in the truck – that’s all we wanted them here for anyway, off we go, first load to the new pad. Arrive, unload, pay and off they go. Then we start going backwards and forwards, backwards and forwards it never ends, the boxes keep coming, the bags keep coming, it never stops, there is so much stuff…… when will it end…….. And then…and then we’re done – well almost anyway, there’s still more to come…..need I say placenta….!

Settling In – Bringing Baby Home
So I look around, I have a plan. 1: Bedrooms, 2: Kitchen, 3: Everything else……. Well that’s the plan isn’t it……. I do get the bedrooms and kitchen done pretty quick and I think I can get the house sorted in a couple of days…. oh how wrong was I……. Just adjusting to a new place is a big deal for both humans and animals. New place, new spots to put things, new shiny things to discover…. put something in one place, don’t like it, move it, unpack it, repack it, on and on until slowly, we figure out the best place for things to go, we unpack and do not repack, we throw out, we settle into the groove of the house, we unpack, we adapt, we adjust and we make this house our home.

So for everyone out there that is thinking of moving soon, just remember, moving is like giving birth – when you are doing it, it kinda sucks but soon enough you will forget the pain and enjoy your new lifestyle change.

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About itsnotjustmeright

It's Not Just Me Right? Coping with life, venting, ranting, raving, laughing and giggling along the way.
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2 Responses to Moving House Is Like Giving Birth

  1. Ahh. Too much funniness!

    Like

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